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It's Not About You

We are literally all walking around with our own unique worlds sitting between our two ears. We talk to ourselves more than we will ever talk to anyone else. We are having a never-ending dialogue with our own thoughts. When we talk to another, remember that they, too, are having a never-ending dialogue with themselves. You can be in the same room with several like-minded people, and yet you will all have a distinct mind that shapes the way you see and interact with the world. No matter how good of a communicator you are, no one will ever truly understand what it’s like to be in YOUR world. It’s totally unique to you (and that’s pretty powerful). Knowing this, isn’t it funny that we have the silly tendency of taking things personally? When you make another’s actions personal to you, you are indirectly claiming that their world revolves around you… and trust me, it doesn’t.  Another person's actions and words have nothing to do with you and everything to do with them. What comes out of them is a direct insight into what’s inside of them, and unfortunately, their contents can sting sometimes. But when you give yourself the power of owning that nothing is ever personal, you become immune to other people’s internal battles. They were never yours to fight. You have enough to deal with internally; you are not responsible for anyone else’s obstacles.  Now let me clarify what I mean when I say nothing is ever personal. A person can purposely hurt you, intentionally diminish your character with hurtful words, and even completely disregard you, and it’s STILL not personal because healed people don’t hurt people; hurt people hurt people. We just make meaning about ourselves based on the pain others cause us, thus creating an endless loop of hurt people.  You have the power to stop this cycle by not taking anything personally.  Has anyone in your life hurt you? That was a rhetorical question because I know someone has. Maybe that person was a parent or close friend, someone who you value deeply. What did you make up about yourself as a result of their actions or words? Is what you made up true? I don't know... but I do know you were born a powerful creator in charge of your own destiny.  If you want to dive deeper into this, I highly recommend the book The Four Agreements, by Don Miguel Ruiz. The second agreement is “Don’t Take Anything Personally,” along with three other powerful agreements all great leaders must live by. It’s a short, yet powerful read.


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